“Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. I bet when you buy a hat like this, I bet you get a free bowl of soup. Oh, it looks good on you, though.”
Judge Smails’ reaction as he quickly removes the hat and walks out of the Bushwood pro-shop is Oscar-worthy. How do I know certain people will read this and immediately see what I’m talking about, and others will be like, “I don’t get it!”
It’s Caddyshack, and the answer is yes. Yes, as in you should watch it and not tell anyone it’s your first time. Or yes, you should call me and we can speak to each other in only movie quotes. It’s ok, though, if you don’t know what I’m talking about because whether you do or you don’t, you are both falling in line with my plot.
When I was a kid, I was a fashion ‘killa.’ I could rock some unmatching Umbro shorts with a Nike Air t-shirt and a pair of Air Jordans and not skip a beat. Coolest kid in the hallways of my elementary school. Actually, I never owned a pair of Jordan’s until I was 16, so I guess I’m not that cool. I once wore the same pair of sweatpants to school for an entire week, not because I didn’t have anything else to wear, but because I wanted to. The great thing about it, though, there wasn’t some guy staring at me and making fun of my life choices. Maybe complaining about the smell, but not the style. And style, style is, after all, that I’m here to discuss. In the late ’80s to me (remember this is a column and my opinion. Not all of it is a fact), the style was centered around brands. Nike, Adidas, Umbro, Guess, and if you were super cool, Girbaud jeans (you remember that little white patch across the zipper?). Doesn’t it feel like now it’s centered around look, around feel? Do you even remember what life was like pre-stretch jeans? And yes, guys, I’m talking to you. Honestly, if you haven’t bought jeans made of that magic stretchiness, I sort of feel bad for you. Then again, maybe you have no idea what you’re missing.
When it comes to fashion, there seems to be this sense of “FOMO.” You know, at first, you feel like a trendsetter, then it slowly feels bland until eventually, you cave. “I need a new style.” So, where do you go? You go to Pinterest to look at styles, you go to Amazon to check the prices and probably just click “order now.” There are options everywhere until there’s an option you didn’t know existed. That’s just frustrating, isn’t it? The way we are now with our buying habits — the way we want to do all the work ourselves, all of the research. We want to look at everything. We want all of the options. For example, when I’m searching for Air Jordan’s, I want to see every pair before making a commitment. Especially when I get the official approval for the CFO (aka, my wonderful wife). I want to make the best decision because you never know when it’s going to happen again. God forbid you were to make the wrong decision and end up like Judge Smails standing in that pro-shop wearing the wrong hat.
At this point, you’re probably wondering (if you’re still with me) how I’m going to tie a roofing company into this one. If you are, I can’t believe you’re doubting me. How about this. Roofle has over 800 products. WHOA!!! Yeah, over 800. You can be the trendy fashionista that stands out or play it safe with a roof that fits right in. It’s totally up to you and no one else. Just think of your 10-year-old self digging through your closet (or your dirty hamper, Ewww). You go ahead and pick out whatever roof you want. Here at Roofle, when you speak with our customer experience team, we won’t have any right to tell you what roof you think looks great. We can tell you everything you would ever want to know about the product, but that’s about it.
Because at Roofle, you’re in control, and we wouldn’t want to gamble with losing you as a customer.
This isn’t Bushwood, but if it was, we know Judge Smails would remind us, “there’s no gambling at Bushwood.” Again, really banking on, you know, that movie.
I just looked up a list of famous syndicated columnists, and I didn’t recognize anyone on the list. Ok, I did, but they’re not exactly renowned, and now I’m contemplating whether I want to go through with this. The Rooflution is a column; it’s not a blog. Because everyone writes a blog and Roofle is different. Roofle was designed for the customer, and the customer is busy living. The Rooflution is a column about life. About the inconveniences and conveniences, about the happiness and the hardships, but most of all, it’s relatable. It was designed to be different but, most importantly, better. Why? Because the process for getting a roofing quote can stand to be a little different. Being different is what Roofle is all about. I hope you enjoy the column, and if you don’t feel like a three-minute read, you can listen to it. It’s that easy. This is Roofing made simple, not Roofing made effort.
